the last duke: part deux
Thursday, September 3, 2009 9:48 PM
[creeping.normalcy]Dear Paul,
I think you should have remembered where we left off, shouldn't you? Yes, of course. Wonderful! Let's continue, shall we?
...It struck me as I went down that moment that I might have regretted being quite as immature as I was. It was a startling burst of something - maturity or otherwise. What if what I had always secretly, in the deepest darkest corners of my heart, wished for actually did happen? What if I had, even for the fleetest moment, gotten my dream? What if that was possible? What if I regretted it?
What then? I crept down the stairs slowly. What was I actually hoping for? Perhaps a return to normality, perhaps a change to chaos. My young mind was abuzz with various thoughts.
I saw the last remnants of the old world crumble before my eyes.
As my family stared at me with their eyeless eyes, and I stared back at them with my pair, I suddenly irrationally thought of a poem in my head.
First they came for the Communists,
and I didn't speak up,
because I wasn't a Communist.
Then they came for the Jews,
and I didn't speak up,
because I wasn't a Jew.
Then they came for the Catholics,
and I didn't speak up,
because I was a Protestant.
Then they came for me,
and by that time,
there was no one left to speak up for me.Was I to be the lonely one? Yes, yes, Paul, I know it was still rather immature of me to have thought that way, but you have to admit - it was a very long time ago. We have all grown up, both of us, in our own different ways. I have assimilated, well, mostly. And you? Well, you have too, I think, in your strange way.
Yes, I know what you're thinking. People say we're almost like the same person. Yes, okay, they actually haven't said that (or not to my limited knowledge), but haven't you gotten that feeling? It's just something you know. Sometimes it really doesn't matter if you think you can't understand what they're saying, because human nature really is quite predictable.
Anyway, back to the story. In a short moment, I imagined the world a Rapture, and me, the last unrepentant sinner. Was everyone to be the same?
Had I grown up, or had I regressed into childhood?
Regardless, everyone had left me behind. I mean, that was before I discovered you, so it was a different world. Really! I was effectively alone.
In one fell swoop, I suddenly just couldn't understand what my family was saying to me. Gibberish, or Shakespearean prose, it just didn't matter. None of it made sense. Not a single syllable or sound or noise. I just had the greatest desire in my life to listen to noise rock, right at that very moment. Drown out everything, drown out anything. It was a very strange feeling.
I wonder if I should have been more affected, but I just ... wasn't. Can't you understand, Paul, the anticlimax? You know, like a dog chases after a car. But what will the dog do if it ever catches the car? It wouldn't know what to do with it! Imagine its feelings, the mix of emotions exploding all around its head like an orgy of confusion. I was just confused, I guess, like the dog. I always wanted to be left alone, but my genie had came along with a huge catch. I guess I never really meant it, not to that extent.
I actually don't know how I dealt with it. I must have forgotten already, but maybe I just didn't want to remember. But then's then, and now's now. And now, it's mostly okay.
Gets a bit strange sometimes, though, doesn't it? There's a disconnect between what I say and what people hear. Conversations go odd. You know, the other day I was out with Kaitlin, the one with the flowers? The explosion of colour on her pretty head. Yeah, didn't work out well, I guess. We both got tired of trying to understand each other, I guess. After a while, we just lapsed into silence. Maybe if either of us cared enough, we could have done something fun, but I guess ... we just didn't?
Guess life's not too fun for you either, is it? Anyway, enough from me now. You should visit me more often. I kinda miss you, seeing how nowadays you're the only person I talk to much anymore. You are a silent one, aren't you?
(That's a compliment)
Yours Truly,
The Last Duke of Nothingtown
my lovelys
the ambassadors of songs
these are done in three, you see? they get me through the day.
yes, I lie quite a bit. get over it.
-
Animal Collective, Aphex Twin,
Arcade Fire
Architecture in Helsinki, Asobi Seksu, Babyshambles, Babybird
Basement Jaxx, Battles, Bauhaus, Billy Talent
The Blood Brothers, Blood Red Shoes, Camera Obscura
Children of Bodom, Circle Takes The Square, Crass
Crystal Castles, Cut Copy, Cansei de Ser Sexy, Daft Punk
The Death Set,
Devin Townsend, Dip
Dirty Pretty Things, Does It Offend You, Yeah?, Elbow
Electric Light Orchestra, Electric Six, Fake Shark - Real Zombie!
The Fiery Furnaces, The Flashbulb,
Foals, Fool's Gold
Franz Ferdinand,
Fuck Buttons, Gallows,
Genghis Tron
Genki Rockets, Girls,
The Go! Team
Gold Panda, Gorillaz, Grizzly Bear
HEARTSREVOLUTION,
The Horrors, Ida Maria, Iggy Pop
Jason Forrest, Jimi Hendrix, Joy Division,
The Joy Formidable
Justice,
Late Of The Pier, Les Savy Fav, The Libertines
Lily Allen,
Los Campesinos!, M83
Manic Street Preachers, Marilyn Manson, Marmaduke Duke, Matt And Kim
Metric, MGMT, Midnight Juggernauts, Mindless Self Indulgence
Modest Mouse, Mors Principium Est, Muse
My Robot Friend,
Nine Inch Nails,
No Age
Now, Now Every Children,
The Number Twelve Looks Like You,
The Octopus Project, Oh No! Oh My!
Pete and the Pirates, Phoenix, Peter Bjorn And John
The Pipettes, Plastic Operator, Pretty Girls Make Graves
Prinzhorn Dance School, The Prodigy,
Queens Of The Stone Age
Radiohead, Ratatat, Ramona Falls
Red Wire Black Wire, Regina Spektor, Robots In Disguise
Rolo Tomassi,
Sex Pistols,
St.Vincent, The Strange Boys,
The Strokes(<3)
The Subways, Sugar Army, Super Furry Animals,
Tera Melos,
Test Icicles
Them Crooked Vultures,
The Tiger Lillies, Tokyo Police Club, Towers Of London
TV On The Radio, Ulver,
The Velvet Underground, Vitalic
The Walkmen, The Vines,
Wavves,
The White Stripes
The XX,
Yeah Yeah Yeahs,
Yo La Tengo
the ambassadors of words
I'll think up of it as i go along, because my eyes are currently red and sore from lack of sleep.
You can have Watchmen, though.
the ambassadors of film
28 Days Later, 9 Souls, A Clockwork Orange, Alien(s)
All Quiet On The Western Front
, American Psycho, Battle Royale, Blade Runner, Batman (Begins & The Dark Knight)
The Birds, Blazing Saddles, The Blob, Brokeback Mountain
Brotherhood of the Wolf, Catch Me If You Can, Chaplin
Children Of Men, City of God, Clerks, Dog Day Afternoon
Donnie Darko, Dr. Strangelove, Dune
El Topo, Empire of the Sun, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
The Exorcist, Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas, Full Metal Jacket
Ghost World, The Godfather, Godzilla (Japanese series), The Good, The Bad and The Ugly
Goodfellas, Graveyard of the Fireflies, Groundhog Day, Hellboy (series)
Howl's Moving Castle, Identity, The Iron Giant, Jesus Christ Superstar
Mad Max, The Matrix, Millennium Actress, Monty Python's The Meaning of Life
Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Monty Python's The Life of Brian, My Neighbor Totoro
Nightmare On Elm Street, No Country For Old Men, The Omega Man
Pan's Labyrinth, Princess Mononoke, Paprika
Rabbit-Proof Fence, The Ring, Rocky, The Running Man
Samurai Fiction, Scarface, Seven Samurai
The Shawshank Redemption, The Silence of the Lambs, Spirited Away, Suicide Club, Survive Style 5+
The Terminator (1 & 2), There Will Be Blood, To Kill A Mockingbird, Tokyo Godfathers, Trainspotting
V For Vendetta, Watership Down, The Wizard Of Oz, The World's Fastest Indian
Yojimbo, Zulu
